Marriage can be the greatest blessing of your life, but it takes a lot of work to maintain a close, vibrant relationship for a long time. Sometimes it seems as though the odds are against the success of your marriage.
By taking these simple steps, you can continue to experience the intimacy and fulfillment you crave within your marital relationship:
1. Accept your spouse’s faults. Your spouse may be perfect for you, but they will make mistakes. Everyone has their faults, and a healthy marriage relationship is built on forgiveness and an environment of safety where you can be who you are without fear. Seek to create that environment and watch your relationship blossom.
* Remember that having different interests is healthy. Celebrate your differences. Seek to enjoy the things your spouse is interested in, and your spouse will likely show more interest in your passions. Show that what’s important to them is important to you also, and your significant other will have no doubt that you love them.
2. Be willing to compromise. In marriage, it’s important to pick your battles wisely. Some of the things you do will annoy each other, but it’s important to provide the grace and compassion that makes the other person feel valued. Be willing to give up your way on the small things, and your spouse will likely reciprocate.
3. Ensure both parties contribute. Marriage is a two-person system. Having just one person run everything will make things challenging for both of you. Whether it’s the bills or chores around the house, divide the tasks so that you make it easy for both of you.
* This is also true for recreation. When deciding how to spend your time together, take turns choosing what to do. If you have a movie night, make it a double feature so that each person is guaranteed a movie that they enjoy.
* The 50/50 rule is a good basis for this. With this set-up, both partners play their part in the relationship and no one is superior to the other. As it should be, both become equal partners in the relationship.
4. Show them that you care. A lot of times, when a couple has been together for a long time, they settle into a routine and forget the little things. Each person in the relationship assumes that the other knows how he or she feels. Instead, date your spouse like you did when you first got together. You’ll be shocked at the results.
* Show your appreciation and love for your spouse in small, everyday ways. When you do this consistently, you will notice a dramatic improvement in your marriage almost overnight. Small, inexpensive, thoughtful gifts throughout the year say more about your affection than one large gift on your anniversary. Say: “thank you” and “I love you” often.
5. Common courtesy is king. When in doubt, use the golden rule. Treat your spouse how you wish to be treated. Be considerate and thoughtful. Always be looking for new ways to express your love.
* Be supportive of your spouse. When he feels down, do what you can to let him know you stand behind him. When she’s had a rough day, pamper her and show her through your actions that she matters to you more than anyone else in this world.
Marriage can be a complicated road sometimes, but it can also be the source of tremendous happiness and joy for both of you. Start today to take small steps, commit to loving your spouse with all your heart, and savor a marriage filled with passion, excitement, and a fulfilling journey through life together.
