There are plenty of jokes about in-laws and, unfortunately, some of them are based on the truth. The holidays are one of the most common times when you’ll need to try to be pleasant and cordial. The good news is that you can get through a holiday visit from the in-laws without feeling overwhelmed or overloaded with stress.

One of the best ways to address the situation is to look for common ground. Surely you have something you agree with them on. You should also seek out some peace and quiet for yourself. Even if you have to stay up a bit later or get up a few minutes earlier, set aside time to center yourself, focus on the good things in your life, and prepare yourself for what comes next.

The Holidays are Temporary

As you approach the holidays and while you’re in-laws are visiting, remember:

* The year is long and the holidays are short.
* Your partner loves these people and wants to see them.
* You can agree to disagree without being rude or antagonistic.
* Let things go. What does it matter what they think?
* You still have time to get away occasionally to experience peace and quiet.
* Judgment reflects badly on you, but acceptance paves the way to a smooth holiday.
* Your house will soon be yours again, and you will have at least one good memory.

Ways to Keep the Peace

Consider these strategies to keep the holidays in your heart and your in-laws’ visit from ruining them:

1. Change your point of view. Try to see your in-laws’ visit from the perspective of your partner. These are their parents. If your partner doesn’t see these people all year, they may miss them lot. Let peace reign, no matter how you feel toward them. Your spouse will appreciate your consideration, and your holiday will be more memorable.

2. Suggest things your spouse can do with the parents. That gives them plenty of time to enjoy one another’s company and allows you to go off and do something you would prefer to do. That way, you limit your time with your in-laws without seeming rude. Be considerate and it will help you stay happy and peaceful throughout the holidays.

3. When you do spend time with your in-laws, really listen to what they have to say. You may learn something about them that makes you appreciate them more or that changes your perception of them. The holiday will be what you make of it, so take the time to make it a good one for everyone.

During the holidays, lives are hectic. Visits with in-laws are simply one part of the equation. The time with them can contribute to the positive experiences of the holiday season if you approach it with a positive spirit and a sense of compassion for everyone involved. You can get through the in-laws’ holiday visit with a smile and maybe even look forward to their next visit.